Weekend Assignment: The Pursuit of Happiness
Fresh when it gets here from
Julie Barrett
Monday, July 6, 2009
Karen's assignment is appropriate for July 4: How do you personally pursue Happiness?
First I should define "Happiness." It's a very elusive concept. There are things that make me feel happy, such as reading a good book or hitting "the end" on a story I'm writing.
But what is "Happiness?" The thing that makes me lay back and go, "ahhhh," at the end of a long day? Having a client actually pay up for a change? (In this economy, that should be getting a client that has a chance of paying up.) A vacation? That would make me very happy, but it's not going to happen.
Yep, I pretty much sound like Marvin, the perpetually depressed robot in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. "Life," he famously droned. "Don't talk to me about life." And I should add, "especially on a Monday." I'm sure that's coloring my thinking.
On the other hand, there are a couple of things that make me quite happy, which brings me to:
Extra Credit: How do you know when you've caught it?
I'm not certain I've caught it, but it has caught me. I wasn't looking for love when it snuck up behind me, grabbed me, and refused to let go. When I was younger, I thought I might get married because it was convenient. See? I've been miserable for years. Actually, I knew few happy couples outside of my parents. There wasn't a lot of optimism amongst my friends. Few girls married for real love. It was a convenience, an escape hatch. I grew up in a suburb with a small town mentality. A teenager in a small town wants out. The peer pressure to marry and move out was enormous, and I was determined to at least finish college on the theory that a decent education would serve me better than a marriage of convenience. One friend famously (or infamously, I'm not sure which) told me that if I waited to get married for love, I'd never tie the knot. At that point I wasn't sure if I ever wanted to. I'd rather be miserable on my own than be with someone who made me miserable.
Looking back, that was the perfect mindset to have. While my friends were on the prowl and getting married and divorced and remarried and having kids and divorcing and marrying - all this before I was even 20 - I stumbled into Mr. Right and fell utterly, hopelessly, in love. Actually, if that was hopeless, I should abandon hope more often. We've been married 29-1/2 years. Oh, and my friend who berated me for holding out had the courage to say, "I was wrong." I'm happy to say that person got out of their loveless marriage and did eventually find the right person. Sometimes it takes several tries. I know I'm immensely fortunate to have hit the jackpot the first time around.
The other bit of happiness? He's still asleep. I think it's past time to wake him up and prod him into helping with housework. Why else do you have kids if not to help with housework and fetch the beer? (That's a joke.)
Tags: Weekend Assignment
Filed under: Weekend Assignment
Comments are closed
Karen Funk Blocher said:
I love this. How wonderful - and utterly unMarvinish - that you found each other, and ended up with Chris. And on the first try!
I actually had no intention of ever getting married. Couldn't even imagine it. Then I met John.
Date: 7/11/2009 7:43:39 PM
Date: 7/11/2009 7:43:39 PM
Julie said:
Oh, I wouldn't say the first try. I have some tales of dates gone horribly wrong. I'm keeping mum on that topic, though. ;-)
Date: 7/11/2009 7:48:27 PM
Date: 7/11/2009 7:48:27 PM
Karen Funk Blocher said:
I love this. How wonderful - and utterly unMarvinish - that you found each other, and ended up with Chris. And on the first try!
I actually had no intention of ever getting married. Couldn't even imagine it. Then I met John.
Date: 7/11/2009 7:43:39 PM
Date: 7/11/2009 7:43:39 PM
Julie said:
Oh, I wouldn't say the first try. I have some tales of dates gone horribly wrong. I'm keeping mum on that topic, though. ;-)
Date: 7/11/2009 7:48:27 PM
Date: 7/11/2009 7:48:27 PM
|