Here´s that picture!   

 

Okay, if this works, the picture will be on the compressed side, but it´ll look okay when you click on it for the larger version.
10/26/2004 2:53:36 PM

Sox win!   

 

Now that i;s over I have to admit that I was pulling for them. Does this dispel The Curse once and for all?

Now the Cubs are next, right?

Yeah, right.
10/27/2004 8:41:32 PM

Cunning plans   

Mood: Exhausted   
Music: "The Invisible Band" CD, Travis   
 

IÂ'd really, really planned to write today. (Sorry, BallyK folks, this is a hopefully pro piece.) So I decided to encamp myself and my laptop in the kitchen, supposedly away from distractions. But I am woman: I must multitask. The choir is having a garage sale this weekend, and I promised I'd bake something. This invariably means that I have to bake TWO somethings, because I always do chocolate, and the guys would disown me if I didn' make any to eat at home. Just to make things more hectic, a coffee group friend who is in Europe with her family on a long-term work assignment is in town and will be joining us for coffee tomorrow. I can't bake, do laundry, do my Friday work, and spend adequate time at coffee tomorrow. So I deiced I'd babysit the laundry and babysit the Ghiradelli chocolate muffins (I deserve a treat after all this, right?) and write. Yeah. Right.

It all began with a hissy fit. I fired up the oven and looked in the pantry. No muffin cups. Now, I know I've got a ton of the things, because every time I make muffins I buy cups because I think I'm out and IÂ'd rather have more cups than have to make another trip to the store and spend ten minutes in the express lane behind someone with 30 items. As we all know, ten for the price of one means those ten items count as one. And I'm not gonna waste time trying to convince some trailer park momma who looks like she could beat up half the Dallas Cowboys with one hand tied behind her back that she's in the wrong lane.

But I digress.

I began to pull stuff out of the pantry, then decided damn the muffins, full speed ahead. What was a thinking? I cleaned. I tossed stuff that hadn't been used since the last gasp of the Reagan administration. I made a pile o' stuff for the garage sale. And heaven help me, I dug up some plastic boxes and organized things!

With the pantry clean, I decided it was time to start on some muffins and treat myself to a low-fat frozen meal - after I'd zapped the thing. After a quick meal I thought that I might actually get down to work, until I made the mistake of taking a quick look at the weather forecast. We've got a cold front on the way, which normally would make me happy, but I realized that I have absolutely no place to put plants at night. Normally they go in the garage, but after we moved the relative into assisted living our garage looks like Auntie Wainwright's shop on "Last of the Summer Wine." Yep, stuffed to the gills with crap. We're supposed to sell it, only the relative might be moving to a larger apartment, so we have to wait.

I've also got most of the relative's plants on the patio. She had too many for her small apartment, so I took them in, feeling sorry for them. The plants were healthy, but some were so badly rootbound that I had to separate them lest they died from overgrowth.

And then there's the Incredible Multiplying Aloe Vera Plant. Chris bought this a few years back, and it has thrived on neglect. I've repotted it a couple of times, but over the last year it has sprouted many teeny aloe vera plants. Chris calls them his "babies," and that's fine as long as that's the only type of baby he's going to be involved with at this age, if you get my drift. So I've got baby aloe vera plants all over the place. The patio looks like a jungle.

When the nights get cool I need to at least bring in the aloe vera babies as they´re still taking root. Cats aren't supposed to eat the stuff, so I had to find (and clean) a shelf or two that the cats can't jump on. This means two shelves in the kitchen that are home to a couple of straggling porthos plants. While I was cleaning the shelves I found a baggie containing some sprouted seeds. I'd forgotten about. Chris wanted to try to grow a lemon tree, so we put some water and seeds in a plastic zipper bag and put them on the shelf where it was warm (it's near a window) and forgot about them after a couple of weeks. So I planted the seedlings. I'm sure they'll die, as nothing I ever grow from seedlings ever survives.

The shelves are glass, and I have a grow light on the top shelf to shine down on the plants in the winter. I had to take all that down, along with some glass bricks that are on display up there. The bricks were salvaged from the old Dr Pepper building in Dallas - an Art Deco treasure that was demolished by "accident." We love Art Deco - as you can no doubt tell by looking at our site design. I could live in an Art Deco or Craftsman house and be very, very happy. But I ain't rich, so that ain't gonna happen.

Well. The laundry is close to finished, the pantry and the shelves are clean, the garage sale stuff is stacked, and the muffins are baked and wrapped. And I haven't written a word of my story. I have 30 minutes before I have to start dinner and I've got this nagging feeling that there's one more thing going on tonight that I've completely forgotten about. Better go check my calendar, finish the laundry, and scream.
10/28/2004 12:22:11 PM

Tired   

 

Boy, I just thought I was exhausted yesterday. Too many things to do and not enough time.
10/29/2004 9:26:24 AM

George Carlin, Teacher?   

 

No kidding. The comedian tells CNN that if he hadn't gotten into performing he might very well have been a teacher. Carlin has a fascination with the English language, and it shows in his work. This is one of the things that attracted me to his comedy back in the 1970s. Even my parents found him so funny that my dad insisted we take Occupation Foole with us on our annual Chrstmas trek north to play to some of the relatives. We've played some of his bits for Chris, but so far have stopped short at the "Seven Dirty Words." I have to admit that is one of my favorite all-time comedy bits. Yeah, it's profane, but what makes it so hilarous is his observations of what broadcasters could get away with at the time. My favorite was the baseball announcer saying the batter "has three balls on him." It certainly gives the term "full count" a whole new meaning.

Yes indeedy, George Carlin would make a fine teacher. Where do I sign up, professor?
10/29/2004 10:06:19 AM

Long weekend   

 

Well. We did the two garage sales yesterday. I'm totally bushed. Still. Perhaps I'll feel like blogging more tomorrow.
10/31/2004 6:38:20 PM

Things to do at the polls   

 

I will be voting tomorrow, and I expect a line. I don't recall ever having to stand in much of a line since 1980 or so, but I usually go to an election in a presidential year prepared to do so.

So, what will I take with me?

Identification. My drivers license usually suffices, but this year I'll bring along my certificate, and quite possibly the postcard the county sent to remind us of our voting location. The location hasn't changed in the twenty years I've been here, but I plan to be prepared for glitches.

Reading material. I picked up a copy of Jeeves and the Feudal Spirit last week. PG Wodehouse is always a fun read. I won't do like I did my first election and show up with a "Bill the Cat for President" shirt and a copy of Calvin Trillan's With all Due Disrespect. The election officials gave me a nervous smile until they saw my party affiliation on my registration certificate. then we had a fun, non-political conversation. No one else was in line.

A sense of humor. See above.

A fully-charged cellphone, which I shall turn off the moment I enter the polling place. If the line is long and anything interesting is going on, I just might blog. If I can tear myself away from the Wodehouse, that is.

Proper attire for the weather. Tomorrow will be cool and windy. Yes, the long-awaited cold front is scheduled to arrive. If itÂ's really windy I'll pack along a mask. (If you see a woman in a dust mask tomorrow, don't worry; it's not a political or terror statement. She's simply trying to avoid an asthma attack.)

I plan to take Chris to school and then head on over to the polling place. If it's not terribly cold and windy I'll park at home and walk or ride a bike to the school. As a reward for doing my duty I'm going to head out to buy the new Travis CD, which is due out tomorrow.
11/1/2004 11:16:20 AM

Election education   

Music: Something by Tom Lehrer or Mark Russell, perhaps?   
 

Okay. The kid is fifteen, which means he'll be old enough to vote in the next presidential election. Why are no teachers teaching about the election? Could it be that this is a deeply divided nation that someone is afraid of injecting politics into discussions about ... politics?

Why, when I was in school (she said, reaching for her cane), some teacher always took some time to talk about the election. It was never a politically-charged speech, but more of a reminder of the importance of voting. One teacher might ask students to spend some time watching the election coverage and to give a lesson on the electoral vs. popular vote. There were reminders to 18 year-olds (few though they were) to get registered to vote.

Given what happened four years ago, I'd love to see some teachers using this election to teach about the electoral vs. the popular vote. What's wrong with asking students to watch some of the election coverage tomorrow night? These high schoolers, for the most part, will be voting in the next presidential election. Doesn't it make sense to educate them about the process?

When we had the whole Florida mess four years ago, one of Chris' teachers actually did drop the canned lesson plan and spent time discussing what was going on in Florida. She taught about the difference between hanging and pregnant chads and why they played such a large role in the recount. She had them following the news stories. As far as I know it wasn't a partisan exercise. It was an exercise in government.

Earlier that spring when I went down to vote in the primary Chris went down with me. The primary happened to fall during Spring Break, so we cycled down to the school. The election officials did something very cool: They allowed children to use the demonstration voting machine. We had punch cards at the time, and they had cards clearly marked as demonstration ballots. He got to cast his "vote" and was given an "I Voted" sticker. I believe he even got to bring the ballot home with him. He thought that was pretty cool.

Tomorrow I hope to get him to watch at least part of the election coverage. Being the junkie that I am, I'll probably not go to bed until someone makes a call or I can no longer stay awake - whichever comes first. I plan to talk about the polls vs. the actual outcome and we'll even surf the web if need be for additional information.

I'm fully aware that I'm a news junkie, and tomorrow night's coverage may be as exciting to him as watching paint dry. I am going to try, though.
11/1/2004 11:34:07 AM

We´ve voted!   

 

My cunning plan worked except for two small glitches: It rained so I ended up driving to the polling place instead of walking; and there was no line. Come on, folks!

One of the election officers said she was surprised and had expected more people, but did note that there was a line early, when the polls opened. Perhaps there's another one now, at lunch hour. I'm not going down to look.

Next, I went to Fry´s and picked up an ink cartridge and the new Travis CD. Then, it was off to Coffee Haus to plug in and write. I got 2000 words out today! For me, that´s amazing.

Then I sauntered over to Half-Price books to get some French reference books for Chris. I also picked up a copy of "Stormbreaker," by Anthony Horowitz. I´d heard the last couple of episodes of the abridged reading on BBC 7´s Big Toe show, and about a month or so ago they aired a reading of the sequel. It´s a young adult book, but seemed very well-written, so I thought I´d give it a look.

Now I´m home and grabbing a bit o´ lunch. Then I think I´ll read and perhaps take a nap (woke up last night and couldn´t get back to sleep) to get ready for watching the returns tonight.

When I took Chris to school this morning I mentioned that we´d be watching the returns. He didn´t cringe as much as I expected. Then I said, "Oh, Tim Russert will have his whiteboard." His response: "Cool." Maybe I do have a news junkie in the making.
11/2/2004 10:33:42 AM

Blogging the election   

 

We now have the election returns from the cats - on the carpet. The result is ....

Neutral.

Frankly, if it had been either red or blue, we would have shut things down and made a fast trip to the vet.
11/2/2004 4:31:39 PM

Ohio, Ohio, Ohio...   

Mood: Tired   
 

...or as the great Yogi Berra said, "It ain´t over ´till it´s over."

I finally got Chris off to bed about 12.30 this morning, after Drudge called the election. Of course, right after that the Kerry camp said, "not so fast..." on Ohio.

So here we go again. I think Ohio will go for Bush in the end. I´d pegged that one as Kerry by a hair. In fact, I figured Kerry would squeak this one out. Just goes to show you that you shouldn´t depend on Stately Barrett Manor for your election coverage.

Whatever the outcome, I just want the popular and electoral votes to both swing in the direction of the same candidate. We´re gonna have acrimony again, but I´d hope that it won´t be as bad if it seems that the winner has some sort of mandate.

The cats may have had the right idea in the end with their neutral prediction.
11/3/2004 6:19:12 AM

Final (I think) election thoughts   

 

No, not final. I´ve got something I wrote this morning that´s locked away in my notebook. I´ll look back over it and possibly post it later tonight.

Now that it´s over I´ll reveal that I voted Liberterian. Why? It was partly a protest vote, but mostly because I wasn´t happy with either candidate. And the funny thing was, in talking to people today I ran into a lot of folks who felt the same way. I find that significant.

Why the protest vote? Well, Texas was a done deal, as far as the electoral vote was concerned. As a result, we saw little or none of the presidential candidates. We weren´t worth pandering to. As a result, I really felt that my presidential vote didn´t mean squat.

What really bothers me is that we had several hotly contested Congressional races here in Texas, and I wonder why John Kerry or his strategists didn´t think that it would be worth putting in an appearance in support of the Democrats. Bush came through last spring and Cheney made a whistle stop, both in support of Republican candidates. Some Republican strategist must have thought those races warranted attention from the top to get out the vote. If nothing else, Kerry could have brought some folks to the Democrat side had he come into town. Where I live is strongly Republican but the Democrat base has exploded in the last couple of years. It would seem to me that it would behoove the party to come lay a little groundwork.

I´m not a Democrat, by the way. I´m just calling what I see as a major missed opportunity.

Speaking of opportunities, Kerry siezed one today with his speech. I´m still not a big fan of Kerry, but he scored some points with me today. I´m sure that giving that speech was one of the toughest things he´s ever had to do. I´m glad that he made a point to say that they didn´t plan to pursue legal action as that was in the best interests of the nation. Yeah, the cynic in me says that he probably knew he didn´t stand much of a chance to win a legal challenge, but if there´s any time when putting the best face forward is important, this is it. And he did it.

I missed Bush´s speech, but I hear he reached out to the other side as well. That´s one thing Bush really needs to do over the next four years. As governor of Texas he had the reputation of someone who was willing to reach out to the other side. That´s one of the biggest dissapointments of his tenure in the White House so far, at least in my mind. He needs to sieze the opportunity. But will he? I´m not sure, and that worries me to no end.

Enough of politics for now. I´m going to go throw a ball at some sticks and see if I can make the sticks fall down.
11/3/2004 3:04:12 PM

What a way to start the morning   

 

The telephone rang promptly at 8. No Caller ID information. Because of the early hour I answered rather than let it go to the machine.

"Hello?"

Pause.

"Hello?

Pause. I reached for the "off" button.

"Uh, Julie?"

"Yes?"

She then launched into a spiel for some company I´d never heard of before that was supposedly "offering services in my area." Then she asked if I was a "digital shooter." I had to ask her to repeat that one. What´s wrong with, "do you shoot digital pictures?" I mean, what´s a digital shooter? Is there some new digital technology for gun owners? Do I shoot the pixels on my computer display for recreation? Granted, some days I´m ready to torpedo this monitor, but I don´t think that´s what she meant. I´m sure she meant digital photography, and I strongly suspect her company got my information because I subscribe to a magazine for photographers.

"Well," I replied, since you´re calling at eight in the morning with no Caller ID information, this is an illegal phone call. How about if you just put me on your do not call list?"

She was not happy. Awww.

I found the photo magazine´s web site and they don´t claim to share their information with telemarketers. So perhaps a camera manufacturer shared my data? I always check the NO box when I fill out warranty cards. This really, really ticks me off.
11/4/2004 6:06:29 AM

A genius, greatly missed   

 

Over the weekend I broke down and purchased the last DVD set of the Granada Sherlock Holmes series, starring Jeremy Brett. Every generation since the turn of the century has had their Holmes, and Jeremy Brett was ours.

Until I read the liner notes for this set I had no idea how ill he was during the filming of that final series. I do remember reading of his death in the newspaper on my birthday in 1995.

Brett was the Sherlock Holmes of his time. Basil Rathbone could never have portrayed the great detective cooly injecting a seven percent solution of cocaine into his veins. Rathbone was a fine actor, but the times in which he lived would not permit such a raw characterization. An acquaintance of mine at the time the series first aired told me she loved Jeremy Brett´s portrayal of Holmes, "because he was so rude." That wasn´t a flippant remark; Brett did portray Holmes as a man who did not suffer fools glady. That was certainly more true to the literary roots of the detective.

I read that, rather than take over the character, Brett allowed the character to take him over. It showed in every episode. It was as though Brett had allowed Holmes to take over, so to speak. The result was a wonderful combination of nuance and completely over-the-top Victorian theatre.

It´s a testament to Brett that it´s possible to watch an episode several times, and still pick up on some subtle aspect of Holmes´s character. The programs remain as fresh to this day as they did when they first aired twenty years ago.

Good night, Jeremy Brett, wherever you are.
11/4/2004 7:15:44 PM

Uneasy   

 

It´s probably just me, but sometimes little things happen that set me on edge. Yesterday a group of armed robbers hit a bank in a suburb south of us. They fled up north and opened fire on police not far from where we live. I was going to visit a particular grocery store yesterday after I´d finished my writing binge at a nearby coffee shop, but decided against it at the last minute. It turned out that I would have landed right in part of the chase had I followed through with my plans.

Shudder.

Today I was taking Chris to school and noticed an SUV blocking the entrance to a street. I didn´t think much of it at first because there´s always someone who decides to use an intersection to turn their vehicle around. Yeah, it blocks traffic, but that´s a different topic. I happened to glance at the driver, and instead of furtively looking at traffic for an opening she appeared to be reading something. The first thought that flashed through my mind: Police.

Now, that probably wouldn´t have even crossed my mind had it not been for yesterday's events. And sure enough, after I dropped Chris off at school the SUV was gone. For some reason I looked down the street, and spotted two officers getting into a marked car. Their body language wasn´t inductive of trouble, and perhaps it was all just a coincidence, but when nasty things happen this close to home, it does set me a bit on edge.
11/5/2004 7:01:38 AM

Friday!   

Mood: Getting better   
Music: "Sing," Travis (I can´t get it out of my head!!!)   
 

Yes, it´s finally Friday. I still have the cold from you-know-where, but this is Tex-Mex Friday. I will drag myself out. Feed a cold and all that, right? Besides, one of the ingredients in a margarita is lime juice, which as we all know, has Vitamin C. And Vitamin C, as we all know (all together now) is good for fighting colds. And then there´s that big, juicy slice of lime perched on the slated rim of the glass. Yep, more of that lovely Vitamin C.

I´m reminded of the advice of a professor back in college. He suggested I take a particular cold medicine because it was twenty-five percent alcohol. Gosh, how could I argue with that? Unfortunately, whatever else was in the stuff kept me nodding off in class the next day. Sleep is a good thing when you´re sick, but sleep and mid-terms do not mix. I went to the student health center for some relief, and was prescribed a combination of drugs that made me high. No kidding.

To this day I am very careful about the meds I take. But I´ll risk a margarita tonight. Sometimes I´ve just got to make the sacrifice.
11/5/2004 12:46:52 PM

Desecrations   

 

This post started out to be some notes about Interior Desecrations, the new book from James Lileks. I guess I´ll start there anyway:

What a fun book! Lileks skews 1970s interior design with the same relish as he did atomic-age recipe books with The Gallery of Regrettable Food. The illustrations are actual images of 1970s design. If you´ve lived through that era, chances are you´ll find a piece of furniture, some art, or something that you once had. Go ahead, admit it you owned it. It´s therapeutic, you understand.

I nearly lost it when I saw our carpet used as a background on one of the pages. It is "ours" only in the sense that it came with the house, and we ripped it out as soon as we got the money, which believe me, was not soon enough. We had to live with that monstrosity for some time. How do I describe this carpet? Low shag, that´s a given. The colors were a mish-mash of Tex-Mex food: Green (guacamole that´s been out of the fridge just a few too many hours), brown (thrice-refried beans), and burnt orange (think: cheese over chili sauce). As you know, I´m a huge fan of Tex-Mex, but not as a floor covering.

The living room also had the flocked wallpaper from hell. This stuff was green and gold, and would cause the kind of sparks one might get from a Van de Graaff generator every time we touched it on a cold, dry night.

I went to find some pictures of this carpet - and hopefully the wallpaper - to post. When I opened the picture drwawer, I´d found that moisture had made its way in at one time - lots of moisture. A stack of school pictures is ruined, as are some of the snapshots. Fortunately, the negatives were enclosed in plastic sleeves and they all survived.

The kitchen table is now covered with pictures, some of which don´t smell very good at all. I am devastated.
11/8/2004 12:55:43 PM

Morning   

 

Here I am, enscosed at a table at a local coffee house. Time to hunker down and write. Just one question: Why is it that some SUV drivers insist on taking up two spaces designed for compact cars when there is an abundance of full-sized spaces nearby? Are they just ignorant, or do they think the rules don´t apply to them, or what? To every truck and SUV driver who doesn´t feel this insane compulsion - and I know you´re out there - thank you for doing the right thing.
11/9/2004 7:11:53 AM

Just a slightly new look   

Mood:    
Music:    
 

I´m experimenting with a somewhat new look to the journal. And just to keep the database size down, I´ve archived everything prior to 2004. They´re not searchable (perhaps that will come later), but they are there for your amusement. Or is that bemusement?

[EDIT] Okay, this is really a slight variation on the look of the rest of the site, and I´m still not happy with the title graphic. But it gave me something to do while stuck on my novel, so there.
11/9/2004 4:34:50 PM

Chill in the air   

 

We had a cold front come through in the night. I suppose this means I need to bring plants in. The jungle moves indoors.
11/11/2004 12:34:45 PM

Still stuck   

 

Yes, I'm still stuck on the novel. I've given up on 50,000 words in 30 days, but am now shooting for a near-Christmas deadline. Too many things have cropped up. When you have a kid (or two or six) This time of the year gets hectic. We're winding down to the end of the semester, which means more concerts, more activities, and oh yes, semester finals.

My shoulder has also recovered to the point where I can start doing cloaks again - and I have a lot of fabric to get through before the end of the year. I just wasn't able to sew for the Halloween season.

I ordered new glasses today from one of those mega one-hour stores. Yes, ordered. It's going to take two weeks. This is what happens when, without correction, you require sonar to get from point A to point B. I really hate going to shop for glasses, so much so that I haven't done so in six years or so. My eyes have changed a lot, and therefore it was time.

Now you may be asking yourself how I could stand to wear the same glasses for so long. The catch is, that I only wear them one day a week, or unless my eyes are so irritated from allergies that I can't stand to wear my contacts. The rest of the time I wear disposable, extended-wear contact lenses. I'm supposed to rest my eyes from contacts one day a week, which means I don't care if my glasses have the most up-to-date prescription. That's probably not a good attitude, but there ya go. For the first three or four years with these glasses my prescription hardly changed at all, so there really was no reason to spend megabucks on new glasses.

As I was saying, I hate going to these places simply because it's like walking in to the Smorgasbord of eyewear. Frames everywhere. Samples of tinted and bifocal lenses casually laid out on counters for your enjoyment. I'm not a slave to style, but it always seems that the nice, practical pair I like comes from a designer line. I end up compromising and choose from the standard line. After all, if I'm just wearing the things one day a week, why get a designer frame? I might think differently if I wore glasses every day, but sheez, it's one day a week. Okay, I'm cheap. So there.

Of course, part of the service is now the chemical pack from one of the circles of Hell. I'm not sure which circle at this point. What happened to just using a soft cloth to clean lenses? The chemicals, or so the literature says, are to help protect the coatings on the lenses. In other words, to keep the scratch-resistant coating from ... scratching.

Oy.

I did spend a bit extra to get the newer, lighter lenses. There may be a bit of vanity involved, but mostly, it's worth extra to not have a pair of glasses hang on my nose like an Albatross. Back when I was in college, I wore thick glasses. When the new plastic lenses hit the market I briefly considered them, but discovered to my horror that they were THICKER than glass lenses. It's bad enough to have lenses that are stamped, "Coca-Cola Bottling, Company, Atlanta, GA" on the edge; I just couldn't see going for something that screamed, "I'm a dork!" Okay, I was a dork in those days, but I tried not to shout it out if possible. Only at Star Trek conventions. So, I can be forgiven for wanting thin lenses.

Two weeks. Yeesh.
11/15/2004 1:13:24 AM

I hope I'm being premature...   

Mood: Disappointed   
Music: "Turn out the lights, the party's over..."   
 

Where's Dandy Don Meredith when you need him? Early in the 2nd quarter, and the 'boys look done. Stick a fork in 'em, Mabel...
11/15/2004 6:50:49 PM

This is NOT me!   

 

I found this on one a site linked to GAFF. I decided to try to make the most awful, eye-irritating creature that I could. Not quite spork-inducing, but it´s getting there.

(Click on the enlarge link to see the picture in all its gory - I mean, glory.)
11/18/2004 7:12:41 PM

One frustration after another...   

Mood: Erm...frustrated?   
 

It's just one thing after another here at Stately Barrett Manor. Today I'm wrestling with a newish fax/modem device. My old fax machine gave up the ghost, and I decided it was silly to spend a fortune on yet another machine that takes different ink cartridges that are going to dry up anyway. Add to that the fact that I very rarely get faxes these days; it's all done by e-mail. The only problem is that I have a couple of clients who want to get invoices by fax. So, I thought, why not get a fax/modem? The only problem is, it won't send faxes. Either it hangs partway through the fax, or a garbled document comes out on the other end. So, I went to the tech support site for the modem and they suggest - get this - hooking a fax machine up to the modem! I am stunned. So, I went to the support form. It resets itself after I fill in the blanks. The retailer has a 30-day return period. Guess I'll take it back.

11/22/2004 9:38:26 AM

Sigh   

 

Today is a school holiday, and as such I slept in for about an hour. Joy. I also kept the TV on for longer than usual. I normally have it on until time to get Chris off to school - if even that late. I walked in on the obligatory stand-up from the airport, complete with wailing and gnashing of teeth over security and crowds.

Yada, yada, yada. I know it's a slow news day, and they have to fill time with something. I guess I should be glad it isn't more moaning about the woman here in Plano who cut the arms off of her baby. Hell yes, it was a tragedy. But until she starts to talk (or her docs weigh in), why she did it is just meaningless speculation.

How about some real news, like the brewing quarterback controversy? Okay, I'm being flippant, but as a news junkie, this is why I don't watch much TV news these days. Which brings me to Dan Rather's retirement. Interesting that the announcement was made before the results of the CBS internal investigation into "Memogate." Of course, that investigation seems to be taking one heck of a long time. I wonder if they're going to release the results over the holiday weekend, when no one is paying attention except perhaps Matt Drudge?

Oh, well. Probably won't blog for a few days due to family obligations. Have a safe and happy Thanksgiving, everyone.
11/24/2004 9:12:13 AM

Monday Ramblings   

Mood: Is it morning, yet?   
Music: Only the banging in my head   
 

Just a few random notes while the second cup of coffee and the high-fiber breakfast cereal sink in:

Here's a list of Top Ten Britcom Sketches. No surprise that the Dead Parrot is number one, but I was a bit surprised to see "Goodness Gracious Me's" Going For an English at number four. Oh, it's a brilliant sketch, but I suppose I'm surprised that it topped some other classics, like The Ministry of Silly Walks.

We made it through the weekend. Chris had a ton of homework, and with some prodding, he got everything out of the way. He still needs to finish a project next weekend, but at least he buckled down and did his work this time around.

We did a pretty good impression of trying to stay away from the stores this weekend, save a trip to Target to purchase supplies for the relative in assisted living. We waited until the afternoon on Friday, and the crowds weren't too bad at all.

Now I have to come up with a brilliant idea for this year's Christmas card. This could be fun...

Christmas lights started to pop out in our neighborhood last weekend. I'm still trying to figure out the appeal of those icicle lights. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that we don't get a lot of snow here in Texas, and people feel a need to simulate a winter wonderland. That I can buy, but a puny string of lights dangling from the roof just doesn't say "icicle" to me. And now we have the abomination of the colored icicle lights. Why, oh, why? :bangs head on desk:

I was hoping to make 50K words for National Write a Novel Month. Didn't manage. I got stuck at 10K, and then I had to stop and do Real Family Things (TM).

And now I must go do Real Work (TM) if I want to earn a paycheck...
11/29/2004 7:02:12 AM

My sinusssss(es)!   

 

No blogging because I haven't been breathing. Yes, it's time once again for the annual sinus fun-fest! I feel better than I sound, and I sound awful due to the constant drainage. And I don't get much sleep, and what sleep I do get is in fits and starts on the couch, sitting up. I think there's some light at the end of the tunnel, so to speak. I hope so. I really, really, REALLY don't want any antibiotics right now.

I did feel up to bowling and that was up and down. Went down to the Half Price Books flagship store this afternoon and picked up a BBC radio dramatization of Agatha Christie's The Sittaford Mystery. Several familiar voices, including Jo Kendall and Stephen Tompkinson.

I've been working on a very short Ballykissangel fic in fits and starts. It's not good enough to post at this point.

I think I'm going to go get something er, medicinal to drink and head off to bed. I fell asleep while listening to the BBC tape this afternoon, I'm sorry to say. It was a good dramatization, but I'm so lacking in sleep that I just couldn't keep my eyes open.

Speaking of British radio plays (plug, plug) the Texas Radio Theatre Company has two more performances of my adaptation of The Sign of Four next week. I attended one rehearsal, and it sounded good. I plan to make next Friday's performance and hear it "for real." If you'll be there, I'd love to say "hi."
12/1/2004 7:17:46 PM

This won't be fun   

 

My sinus infection returned with a vengeance last night. I'm drinking liquids like mad. And it appears as though today is the day the city has decided to replace a leaky valve next to the water meter. I'm glad it's getting done. It's needed to be replaced for years. But the timing could have been just a bit better, don'tcha think?
12/2/2004 7:44:17 AM

Breathe, Julie! Breathe!   

Music: "Harder to Breathe," Maroon 5   
 

I thought I was going to have to jump-start my lungs during the last two minutes of tonight's game. Yep, I'd written the Cowboys off. Just goes to show that Yogi Berra was right: "It ain't over 'till it's over."
12/6/2004 9:35:01 PM

It could have been worse   

Mood: Feeling as though I've dodged a bullet   
 

Well. That's it. Just, well!

I decided that I would settle in and take a long nap in hopes of ridding myself of this sinus infection for good. But first, I'd just send off a few invoices. I chronicled my fax machine woes a few weeks back. Suffice it to say the new fax/modem didn't work. Tech support at the manufacturer was no help whatsoever. Their advice - plug a fax machine into the modem - was completely useless. I tried my old fax machine one more time, and it simply would not feed pages reliably. Okay, that was it: I was going to buy a new fax machine!

Ah, but which machine? I pored over web sites and finally ended up at Office Depot, where I purchased a Brother MFC-420CN. I decided that as long as I was at it, I should have something with a sheet feeder and the ability to OCR multi-page documents. As a bonus, this unit also has an Ethernet jack and takes nearly every storage card on the planet.

So I got the box home and cleared off a space on the shelf. While I was unpacking the box I took the time to update the video drivers on my desktop PC. I'd had trouble with a recently purchased DVD and thought that might help. It did, and I watched about ten minutes of the film until time to install the software.

I installed the software, rebooted, and sat staring as the computer searched for IDE ports. This was not good. I rebooted. Again, it sat there. I knelt down under the desk; it was hot under there. Yep, the fan on my power supply had fried. So it was off to the nearest electronics store for a replacement. I had the thing purchased and swapped out in under an hour - a record! I hit the power switch and watched as it sat with the message "Memory T" staring me in the face. O-kay. I shut it down, re-checked the cables, and fired it back up. Same thing.

Panic mode.

After five minutes I decided that blind panic wasn't going to solve my problems, so I popped a DVD (Oktober - nothing like a paranoid fantasy thriller for entertainment at this juncture) in and sat on the couch. After I calmed down I decided to Google the problem on my notebook, and found one match. Someone had reported this same issue and the resolution (found through trial and error) was to unplug the USB mouse, reboot, plug the mouse back in, let Windows detect the mouse, and restart the system. Hey, I could do that! After much wailing and gnashing of teeth I narrowed it down to either my USB port or a device connected to same. Half an hour later, and and after much plugging in devices and restarting said computer many times, I finally got it to work. And then the connection to the fax was flaky.

No matter; it was good enough to send my invoices manually. I finally got it running after dinner tonight. As a bizarre side effect it seems that my secondary hard drive is suddenly working again. That suggests that the power supply has been flaky for a while. Or maybe not. This is a computer, after all.
12/7/2004 5:27:15 PM

Repeat after me...   

 

The drop-off lane in front of the school is NOT the place to stop my car, shut off the engine, and have a long talk with my child.

Now write it 100 times on a sheet of paper and turn it in to the principal at your child's school.
12/8/2004 6:54:25 AM

Another Monday   

 

The good news is that my cold may finally be on the retreat. The bad news: It's been a rotten few days. I spent Thursday on the couch, watching DVDs. Thursday night we went to listen to the high school choir and orchestra perform Vivaldi's Gloria. That was good. The real problems were with crowd control. What part of "reserved" do people not understand? During the first performance or two of the evening we had people walking back and forth past our video camera. We were taping for the choir.

Managed to get some laundry done on Friday. That was the only good thing to come out of the day. Yep, it's pretty sad when laundry is the high point of your weekend!

We did - after much wailing and gnashing of teeth - manage our annual Christmas card. I'm going to try and post it before the day is out, but I've got a lot to catch up on first. Already the morning has gone to hell in a handbasket. It started on a wonderful note, when I took Chris to school. Once again, some idiot of a parent decided to park 30 feet past the entrance to the drop-off lane and have a long talk with her daughter. The girl was just sitting there, sucking on a fast food soft drink while the mom chattered away and other parents tried to maneuver around and avoid hitting cars in the other lane. Then I fought traffic across town to pick up my new glasses. They told me they opened at nine. Wrong-o. Now I get to go back and pick up my glasses. They'd better be right this time. I've got a ton of work ahead of me, and really would like to pass the day without a splitting headache from eyestrain. Next, I have to go buy a gift exchange goodie or two, as I was too ill to do so last week. And then I really, really want to try to chill out and watch the Manchester United match this afternoon.

What I really need is a nap. I made fondue last night and forgot my dairy digestive tablet, which meant that I was up half the night in pain.

The eyeglasses place should be open by now. Oh, I hope these glasses are right!
12/13/2004 7:38:10 AM

Could have been worse   

 

United went to a draw with Fulham. Man, they came out the second half like they really didn't care whether they won or lost. That's it: No more Cowboys games for them! ;-)

Did get a bit o' good news this morning: My new lenses were free. I fully expected to have to pay through the teeth for them. Did a bit o' Christmas shopping while I was out. No guys, nothing for you ... yet.;-)

Didn't really get to chill out as I've been babysitting this printer all afternoon. That's the problem with doing our own cards: Printing one at a time in glossy mode takes a very long time. I've got the outsides of one or two to go, and then I'll be home free. The insides are a snap. No promises, but I'll try to have the card up before the day is out. Watch the home page for details.
12/13/2004 2:02:45 PM

Merry Catmas   

 

Our 2004 card is now online.

Payback!   

 

Yes, this is payback for the lousy weekend. First, traffic at the school was moving. What a shock. I did feel sorry for the officer on bicycle patrol, though. The temp here has still not made it up to freezing, and the wind chill is in the lower 20s. Brr. For Texas, this is cold.

Then I went to the Post Office to drop off my cards and buy postage. Yesterday when I went to check my box there were huge lines, both for the counters and the self-service machine. This morning a neighbor happened up at the same time, so I simply handed her card to her. There was no line at the machine, and a helpful USPS lady even talked me through getting international postage for one envelope. It took longer to put stamps on the cards than to complete my transaction.

Next, I hit the drugstore. No line at the pharmacy, and even though I'd lost the box for my prescription, they found it and had my refill ready in five minutes. What a shock.

Sometimes payback can be good. And yep, the small things to add up.
12/14/2004 7:26:37 AM

Attention Alan Rickman fans:   

 

A Flash movie, just for Christmas.

A cartoon sent by a friend

Hee, hee!
12/17/2004 9:37:38 AM

Speaking of our favorite Potions professor...   

Mood: Silly   
 

I could not resist the tug of this. Sorry.

Move your beverages from the keyboard:

Professor Severus Snape surveyed his fifth year Potions class. The students were working on a difficult concoction for the cure of the bite from a White Widow spider. One bite from this arachnid could turn any man into the quivering love slave of the first woman upon which he laid eyes after the spider left her venon. Snape himself kept a large quantity of the antidote on hand.

“Potter.” The Potions master rose slowly from his chair, glancing briefly at a parchment which lay on the desk.

“Professor?”

Snape cleared his throat and swallowed. Speaking these words to Potter of all people would be difficult, but necessary. Although is memory was quite keen he snatched the parchment from the desk in case the words lodged in his throat. “Potter,” he began as he locked eyes with his student. “I love you, Harry.”

The clatter of spoons against cauldrons came to a halt. Draco Malfoy stifled a giggle. “That will do, Malfoy. Five points from Slytherin.” Snape’s gaze never wavered from Harry. “I love you more than anyone else in the world. I know I shouldn’t ask this, but would you go with me to the Yule Ball?”

Several students gasped. “I will take more points away if you do not take care with your potions, class.” Eyes darted back to cauldrons. Hermione Granger began to stir just a bit too quickly, and her potion boiled over, spilling purple slime over her table. “Leave it, Granger,” Snape warned. He turned his attention to the parchment in his hand, and then finished his impassioned speech. “Please say yes.”

“Wha…” If it was possible for Harry to will himself smaller, he would have gladly done so at this moment. Instead, he reached across his cauldron to snatch the parchment, the sleeve of his robe dragging through the potion.

Snape pulled the missive to his chest. “That will be a zero, Potter. The student who wrote this ... this epistle in class instead of concentrating on her work will be serving detention with me.” He surveyed the rest of the class, his lip curled in a cold sneer. “Concentration is essential in the art of potions.” As if on cue, Neville Longbottom’s cauldron exploded, sending purple slime across several rows.

“Ten points from Gryffindor.” Professor Snape strode purposefully to his desk and seated himself. “Five for Granger, and five for Longbottom.” He pointed his wand at the parchment. "Incendio." A brief, yet brilliant flash of flame ensued, turning the parchment to a pile of ash which he unceremoniously swept into a small dustbin. “I despair of anyone in this class becoming successful at potion making.”

12/17/2004 11:45:52 AM

Trying to get into the spirit of things...   

 

Man, this year it's just hard for me to get into Christmas. I suppose it's this darned cold. I'm mostly over it, but I'm still babying myself a bit. Combine that with some work that came up at the last minute (hey, a check is never a bad thing), and Chrismtas has become a very last-minute thing this year.

We finally got our tree today. The good thing about getting a tree this late is that they're 1/2 price. Another good thing is that means fewer more allergy days. I have mixed feelings about live tress: I love them. I love the smell of fresh pine. But they play havoc with my allergies. On the other hand, if I keep up with the Claritin I do fine. I really don't like artifical trees. And just so you know, the city mulches our trees and they go back into feeding the trees in our parks. If the alternative was a landfill, I just might consider an artificial tree.

We got a little shopping done the other night. I'm hoping to get more out of the way over the next couple of days. And now that Chris has finals out of the way, he's also looking forward to doing a bit of shopping.

The things I hate about Christmas shopping are the traffic and the music. Every store seems to play the same insipid songs. And what is it about "Peace on Earth, goodwill to men" that seems to go out the window whenver someone gets behind the wheel of a car? The mantra is, "me first." I always feel fortunate to come out with an unscathed car.

After we got the tree erected and decorated, I went out for some takeaway Chinese and we sat in front of the television, eating and watching the two "Robbie the Reindeer" programs. I highly recommend these - but take the time to select the UK voice talent.

Another pet peeve of mine: Why is it that every animated production made in the UK has to be made over with American voice talent? Americans flock to films such as "Bridget Jones' Diary," "Four Weddings and a Funeral," and my current fave, "Love Actually." Those films wouldn't be making so much money in the States if we stupid Americans couldn't get past the accents and the cultural references. I'll bet "The Simpsons" doesn't get re-dubbed in the UK.

Yeah, I'm in a bad mood tonight. Probably because I didn't sleep well last night. I think I might crash early tonight. Way too much to do tomorrow.
12/19/2004 5:53:33 PM

White Christmas...Almost   

Mood: Cold   
 

We certainly got a dose of winter weather today. Yesterday was so warm we had the house open. Presently it is 28 F/-2 C and we´ve had a dusting of snow. Chris and I went out this morning for a quick meet with the coffee group - just long enough to get something warm inside before running some errands and visiting the grocery store. The stuff was coming down quite heavy earlier today, and it looks like we might have one more round before it´s all said and done. If it doesn´t all melt off in the next day or two, it certainly will on Christmas.

This is about as close as I can remember it coming to a white Christmas. No, I´m wrong: A few years ago we had an ice storm on Dec. 26. Christmas day itself was quite nice.

Must get busy on a job for a client, then I´m going to make Guinness stew and soda bread for dinner. Yum!
12/22/2004 11:29:45 AM

Snow video   

 

I took a short video of the snow earlier today. Sorry, Mac users, but the video came out the best in Windows Media format.

12/22/2004 5:54:40 PM

My Brain Hurts!   

 

The icon says it all.

Boy, today was an unusually long day. Lots of work, which is usually nice, but Chris insists on sitting in the living room and yelling into his Xbox Live microphone. This WILL stop.

I think I have also finished up most of the Christmas shopping. Whatever is left can wait until early next week. And if I am unable to find what I want in the store, I'll order online.

Chris did his shopping yesterday, too. After I picked him up from the mall, I took him to the high school parking lot to let him drive. Come to think of it, that may have something to do with today's headache! ;-) Fair play, he did quite well. This was the first time he had been behind the wheel of my car. I let him drive around, and then gave him a lesson in parking. It's a darn good thing that the parking lot was empty. Every time he crossed the line I made crunching noises. That probably didn't help, but by the time he was finished, he pulled into a parking space as though he'd done it for years. I dread doing this in a parking lot with cars, however.

I was hoping that the lesson would spur him to going back to work on his self-paced driving course. But no, the lure of Xbox Live could not be denied. As I said, that WILL change come next week. I'm only putting in half a day tomorrow - I hope - then I'm off work until Monday.
12/22/2004 6:06:34 PM

Merry Christmas!   

 

Guess it's about time to be hitting the sack for the night. I know what's under the tree for me because it isn't. Erm, what I mean is, Paul and I bought something we both really wanted (and partially needed) and made that Christmas.

Must get up early tomorrow and start the turkey. Our plans changed at the last minute, so we'll be here all day instead of traveling for part of the day. Seems we're always off somewhere on Christmas day, so this will be a bit of a change of pace.

So, hope yours is nice.
12/24/2004 9:24:47 PM

A bit of a puzzle   

Mood: Intrigued   
 

I was going through some things tonight and came upon a cache of old sheet music that had once belonged to my grandmother. One piece in particular that had always intrigued me was this:

(Click on image for a larger version)

So, who was Miss Hettie King, what was she doing dressed as a man, and why did this piece of sheet music end up in the possession of my very straight-laced grandmother?

Google is my friend. I found out that Hetty King was the stage name of Winifred Emms, the daughter of music hall star Will King (stage name of William Emms). Hetty was a male impersonator, a straight woman who played male roles to the delight of music hall audiences. Click on the name to see a biography and a gallery of pictures maintained by a member of the Emms family. They even have a picture of the same piece of sheet music.

Apparently the male impersonator was a tradition in the British Music Hall just like the female impersonator. Male impersonators didn't attempt to hide their gender (as you can see in some of the pictures). I suppose that made it okay in my grandmother's eyes as the male gear was just a stage costume.

At any rate, I'm glad to have solved the mystery of Miss Hetty King.
12/27/2004 8:12:01 PM

At last...   

 

It sort of feels like a holiday. I spent most of the day avoiding work, although tomorrow I shall pay dearly. This afternoon was spent in quiet pursuit of the subtleties of Mornington Crescent. This may require another trip to London to fully investigate the tube system. Life is rough.
12/28/2004 4:03:48 PM

It's not much, but...   

Mood: Concerned   
 

I've just made a donation to the American Red Cross via Amazon.com for the aid of victims of the tsunami. As of this writing, they've collected a little over $1.8 million dollars. A few dollars here and there add up, folks. And it can help to show that we're not all Nasty Americans.
12/29/2004 9:37:36 AM

The new phone books are here! The new phone books are here!   

Mood: Blase'   
 

Yes, it's time for the new telephone directories. Unlike Steve Martin in The Jerk, I can't get excited about seeing my name in the telephone directory. I seem to recall in Bowfinger that being "somebody" meant you received overnight deliveries. The only time an overnight delivery made me feel even vaguely like "somebody" was when the galleys to my book arrived. But as far as my neighbors were concerned, I'd probably ordered another geeky item.

So I took the phone directory in the kitchen to stack with the 278 other phone books which had been unceremoniously dumped on our porch within the past year. This delivery contained a Yellow Pages and - oh, joy is rapture! - a mini me version of the book to carry in my car. If we thought driving with a cell phone in hand was a bad idea, wait until people start driving with a cell phone in one hand and a phone book in another. This is yet another argument for mass transit.

Out of 278 telephone directories, 277 are various versions of the Yellow Pages. Why is that? Two come from local telephone companies. Only one of the two provides me with phone service. They also provide the White Pages, as well as a Yellow Pages for the Greater Dallas Area. The Yellow Pages for my own suburb is over half the thickness of the Dallas book. Presumably they convince advertisers that people in the suburbs won't think to look in the Dallas directory for businesses. Yet, if I'm looking for something, I end up going through 278 copies of the Yellow Pages, plus about double the number of Google hits to find it. What is wrong with this picture?

A case in point: One afternoon the pump on our fish tank died. The major chains don't carry this pump on its own. No, you have to buy it in a kit along with the tank, the filter, the cover, and lights. Only $139 to replace a $30 part. So I began a quest for stores that might carry that part. Lots of ads for "Largest Selection of Tropical Fish," but nothing for people in a Genuine Fish Tank Emergency. 278 phone directories and thousands of Google pages later, we ended up driving 20 miles to a place we'd vested before on a quest for a particular breed of fish. The friendly folks fixed us right up. Their ad had the best clue that they stocked parts. Many Dallas stores had large display ads in the Dallas book, but just a line in our suburban book. Tell me, what is convenient about this?

Why, back in my day The Phone Company gave you one phone book every year, neatly divided in to white and yellow sections. Now everybody and her brother is in the act. And if you own a small business, God help you if you don't advertise in every single book that gets distributed in your community because you don't know which of the 278 books Sue or Stu Homemaker is going to pick up when the plumbing goes out. And be sure to add as many instances of the letter "A" as you can to the front of your name so Sue and Stu can find you quickly. Reliability and courteous service don't matter any more; it's how near the top of the phone listings you rank.

And it's not bad enough that you have to buy a page or two inside the directory. Now the outside of the books are covered with ads, mostly for personal injury lawyers. "Hurt lifting your phone directory? Call us!" And then there's the inserts, which is why directories are now distributed in a handy plastic bag. Yeesh.

At least our city recycles the things.

12/29/2004 3:30:42 PM

Before the holidays drift away...   

 

I thought I might add one more piece of sheet music that I'd found:

(Click on image for a larger version)

I vaguely remember seeing The Lemon Drop Kid on TV when I was younger, but Bob Hope as a bell-ringing Santa sticks in mind more than the song.

Some interesting points about the film:

It is based on a story by Damon Runyan.

It is a remake of a film of the same name from 1934. In the 1950 version, Bob Hope's character is called Syndey Melbourne. All of the character names were rather screwball, in fact.

One actor appeared in both films: William Frawley. Yep, good old Fred Murtz, landlord and wacky neighbor to Lucy and Ricky Ricardo.

So there's your bit of Christmas trivia. Enjoy.
12/29/2004 7:21:14 PM

TV you should see   

 

Please understand, I am not a fan of network television. Yet I've found a network program that I love: House. Yeah, I'm in love with a non-animated show on Fox! That sound you hear below may well be Hell freezing over.

House isn't just another doctor show. Honestly, I haven't been able to really enjoy a doctor show since St. Elsewhere until now. The draw for me was Hugh Laurie. Mr. Laurie is a multi-talented actor and songwriter best known to American audiences as the dad in the Stuart Little films. Or perhaps as Bertie Wooster in the wonderful Jeeves and Wooster series that aired as part of Masterpiece Theatre a few years back. (Jeeves was played by his comic partner Stephen Fry, no small talent himself.) Britcom fans will recall him from several of the Blackadder series and A Bit of Fry and Laurie.

So I had to tune in to watch Hugh Laurie, who plays Dr. Gregory House. House is, to put it mildly, not someone I would take home to meet the parents. Not that he'd want to. Nothing against my parents, but House is egotistical, sports a perpetual three-day beard, and employs the bedside manner of my sixth grade reading teacher. This is to say he would prefer not to have to deal with those whom he is supposed to heal. House also walks with a cane and pops Vicodin like candy.

So what's so great about him? You may well ask what's so great about a certain egotistical, violin-playing, cocaine-shooting detective. The man is brilliant. He hates clinic work, yet he can diagnose a patient by listening to him or her talk about their symptoms. His prescriptions are sometimes unethical. For a man with bowel problems he suggested smoking - but just one or two a day would be enough for the nicotine to work. For another pretending to be in pain he prescribed Vicodin, which he switched with candy, taking the pills for himself.

I have to admit that it took a couple of episodes to draw me in, but once I got there, I was hooked. The writers have finally had a chance to flesh out the characters of House and the supporting cast so it's not just the unfathomable-disease-of-the-week. Of course, we can look at the clock and know the patient will probably walk in moments. However, I fully expect that the writers will shake up the formula a bit in the future. No one ever wants to see a patient die, but this week's disease almost brought it upon herself. She wouldn't admit to having had an affair, which would have sped up diagnosis and treatment. She lived in the end, but her husband left her.

It's a very complex show, and part of the fun is watching the team of doctors unravel the puzzle. And Hugh Laurie - what can I say? He's excellent. Forget Stuart Little and go for Dr. House.

The other show I've fallen for is running on BBC America. Look Around You is a jab at all those science films we had to sit through in school. You know the ones, deadly boring, and conveying little if any information relevant to the current state of science.

The science experiments are screamingly funny in their parodies of the real thing. They also managed to achieve just the right "look and feel" of a boring 1970s science film - you know, the ones that tried to be exciting but put you to sleep instead.

Check it out on BBC America. Both links have fun quizzes, and the BBC site has wallpaper and other goodies.
12/30/2004 8:02:49 PM

Christmas crackers   

 

I should mention these before the season escapes us. The Christmas cracker is a tradition in England. The cracker is a small cardboard tube covered in paper. Inside is a paper crown, a plastic toy, and a motto (joke). They're rigged to make a loud "snap" or "crack" sound when pulled apart.

It used to be difficult to find crackers over here, but now even Target carries them. I thought it would be fun to share a selection of mottoes from this year's round of crackers. Many are bad puns, and some are not P.C. at all, but they're a fun tradition:

Q: What is an underground train full of professors called?
A: A tube of Smarties.
(Smarties is a candy.)

Q: Why do toadstools grow together?
A: Because they don't need mushroom!

Q: Why has the milking stool only got two legs?
A: Because the cow has the udder one!

Q: Why did the wheels stop turning?
A: They were tyred.
(Tyre is what we call a tire in the US.)

Q: Why does this bus stop at every corner?
A: Because it is a greyhound.

And move your beverage away from the keyboard for this one:

Q: Why don't robots have brothers?
A: Because they all have trans-sisters.

Cue the rimshot.

We're off to celebrate New Year's. Well, we celebrate here at home, but this is family time. So you all have a safe and happy New Year!
12/31/2004 6:06:36 PM

Happy New Year!   

 

Okay, so we watched some DVDs, threw way too may darts (at the board, not at each other!) and had our fill of champagne at midnight. For someone who had four hours of sleep last night, I'm amazed that I'm still awake. I do feel the tug of the bed, though.

I spent part of the evening re-editing a couple of BallyK stories. No major changes this time: I made a few fixes to jibe with canon, and changed a few turns of phrase that sounded too American. I'm sure anyone from the UK would find many problems in that department in any of my BallyK stories. It would be too flippant to say that it doesn't matter. No, I want the takes to ring true. But while I'm an Anglophile, I don't live over there. I do my best.

Happy New Year, everyone, and I'm going to make an attempt to get some rest.
12/31/2004 11:17:14 PM

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